WHAT KIND OF RELATIONSHIP?

"It is often said that Christianity is a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. 'Relationship' has many meanings. So we must ask what KIND of relationship we have. Some people ignore Jesus. Some are afraid and some are angry. These are defective relationships."

The Bible describes a healthy relationship with Jesus in many ways. When I first came to know Jesus, I was delighted that I could have a warm relationship with God as my Father. I loved how the J.B. Phillips translation put it, "Consider the incredible love that the Father has shown us in allowing us to be called “children of God”—and that is not just what we are called, but what we are" (1 John 3:1). I found such amazing love in knowing I was a daughter of God and especially that His love was always there. Even when I messed up, He loved me. This family relationship was just what I needed to want to know Him more.

I later discovered that Jesus could be my best friend. He was someone I could spend time with and confide in, with no fear of ridicule or rejection. I could tell Him anything and He was always interested. He cared about every little or big part of my life. He would be my forever friend who would "never leave me or forsake me" (Hebrews 13:5). He has been always there for me--in good days and bad, in sickness and health. He is someone I can always rely on because He is the best friend I could ever have!

But being a friend of Jesus is more than being a friend with my next door neighbor or someone I've grown close to at church. Jesus explains it this way, "You are My friends if you do whatever I command you" (John 15:14). That's not usually what we think of when we think of friends. But if I look at it through God's perspective, I can see it. God connects friendship with loyalty, just as we do (don't we all want a true-blue friend?). I think this verse also shows that He's looking for a relationship with us that demonstrates perfect trust. If we have total confidence in God, knowing He wants only the best for us and loves us to the nth degree, we will do what He says. We'll follow wherever He leads, because He's our trustworthy Friend.

But there's another side to our relationship with God that figures in here. God has become my Saving Lord! He came to my rescue when my life was out of control. He knew I was headed for destruction, so He came to this earth to die in my place, to pay the price that my sins deserved. "No one has greater love than this, to lay down one's life for one's friends" (John 15:13, NRS). No one has ever loved me that much--to give themselves so completely and selflessly. Most have strings attached to their love. "I'll love you IF..." is what they almost say. But not Jesus. His love on Calvary's cross says it all. "God proves His love for us in that while we were STILL sinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:8).

When I accepted that incredible love, it broke my heart! And it changed it in a dramatic way. It delivered me from the sins that had kept me in chains. And it set me free, so I could follow Jesus wherever He went. Our relationship was now in terms of Savior and Delivered prisoner.

But it instantly moved beyond that--all because of His love. Jesus became the One who led. I was no longer running my own life. I didn't want to anymore. I know where my sinful heart leads me--and I am tired of being riddled with guilt and despair. I want the full, abundant life that Jesus gives. So I moved into a relationship with Him where He is my Lord. My Saving Lord (or Lord and Savior as the Bible says).

And that brings me full circle back to being His friend--His devoted and delivered friend, who wants nothing more than to be like Jesus and to do whatever He wants of me. As Jesus says, "You are My friends if you do whatever I command you."

I know there's so many more facets to a healthy relationship with Him. But I think these are some of the big ones. The saving ones. When my relationship with Jesus is like this, it will move into other saving facets--I will work along side Him in helping others to know Him. I'll worship Him as my Creator and Redeemer. I'll pour out my love in loving obedience and devoted service--not to earn His approval or any reward. Just because I love Him so much and I certainly want to follow in His footsteps--to love as He loved me.

LIFE IN THE HAMSTER'S CAGE

"Now to Him who is able to keep you from falling, and to make you stand without blemish in the presence of His glory with rejoicing, to the only God, our Savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord" (Jude 24,25/NRS).

If you've ever watched a hamster in a cage, you know how cute those little guys can be. They're soft, cuddly and one of the most popular pets with children. One of their favorite antics is to run on a kind of treadmill, especially at night. They scurry at top speed, sometimes literally flying out of these exercise wheels.

Whenever I watch them, I can't help but think of the phrase, "spinning your wheels." Because even though the hamsters put in tremendous effort, they never get anywhere. They never arrive at the finish line. I wish I knew what a hamster thinks when he's running like that. Does he feel trapped? Does he get discouraged? Does he ever think, "What's the use?" 

There have been times when I thought like that. I used to battle with my temper almost on a daily basis. The littlest things would set me off and I'd end up yelling and screaming at someone. But then, I began reading the Bible for the first time and discovered how horrible my anger was. I remember reading the book of James over and over again. But I found no hope in reading, "No man can tame the tongue; it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison" (James 3:8). I already knew that. There was nothing I could do to change my temper! I tried  gritting my teeth, counting to ten, praying for victory! But nothing worked. 

I felt like a little hamster trapped on a treadmill. Running and running but getting nowhere. I'd snap and blow up at someone--even my boyfriend who was patience itself. So I'd cry out to God, begging for forgiveness and pleading for victory. But it wasn't long before I fell down again, flat on my face, blowing up again. I was trapped in a cycle of doing the same horrible things over and over. Every day was a battle  I couldn't win. And no one knew how to help me. I felt like the apostle Paul who said, "O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?" (Romans 7:24)

I was a baby Christian in those days and  knew little about the Bible. It literally took me years before I discovered God's way out. Before then, I thought if I could only lick this problem, I'd be on the straight and narrow. Everything would be right between Jesus and me. And perhaps, I'd be a strong Christian with a living testimony that would lead souls to God. But I didn't realize how my temper was only a symptom of a deeper problem. 

I was a ruled by my emotions because I only had a natural heart. I loved Jesus and I'd taken some steps toward Him.  But I hadn't experienced the new birth in my life. My way of thinking had changed.  I knew a whole lot more about the Bible than I ever had before.  But the same person was still sitting on my heart's throne. I didn't realize it for many years, but Jesus wasn't Lord of my life. I was. And my life clearly showed it. 

How could I exchange my heart for a new one? How could I be born again? I didn't know the verse in 1 Peter 1:23, that says "You have been born again, not of perishable but of imperishable seed, through the living and enduring Word of God." I didn't know by experience that the Bible had power in itself to give me new life! I had the answer at my fingertips all the time, but I didn't know it! I began my day with God, but it was like when you're literally starving and you're only got a cracker to nibble on. I needed more of Jesus than that!

So I began submerging myself in the Bible. I was a young mom at this time, with three active children, only about a year apart.  My hours were jam packed with cleaning and cooking, taking care of farm animals and a big garden, not to mention everything I did at church. Life was a whirlwind and I often felt like a hamster on a treadmill. But every available minute that I could spare, I spent with God. I devoured the gospels, one at a time. I saturated myself in the Lord's promises. It's almost like my Bible was hung around my neck. It went everywhere with me. And even when my hands were busy, I was thinking of God's Word and His incredible love for me.

The Bible became my lifeline to Jesus. And though I can't pinpoint the day when the miracle happened, I remember my excitement when I realized I went through a day without losing my temper. It didn't happen automatically. But as I gave myself to Jesus every day and submerged myself in His Word, I had greater strength to say no to the devil. The temptations were still there, just as large and pressing as ever. But I knew Jesus was with me. And what's even better, I knew I was with Jesus. We were working together and I was learning how to abide in Christ. When temptations came knocking, I turned away from them and Christ poured in His power. He was Lord. I was His servant and I longed to do anything for Him! 

I was quicker at turning to Jesus for help and it was easier to say, "not my will, but Yours be done."  It was easier to resist the devil. And I found I didn't need to be in charge of my life anymore. I didn't want the world pushing Jesus out of my day. I wanted to be with Him every possible minute. And the voice of His Spirit was as clear and plain to me as the voice of my husband or my children. God had changed my heart through His Word. By reading it, thinking it, and living it by the power of God's grace, my life was changed from the inside out. For Jesus took away my natural heart and replaced it with His own. His own loving heart. And I began to see victory in my life.

If you're struggling like I was and feel like a hamster in a cage, come to Jesus just as you are. Give him your natural heart and ask Him to give you a new one. Saturate your mind in God's Word, especially in the story of our Savior. Let His love wash over you and cleanse you deep within. Talk to Him as you go through your day--driving to work or washing the dishes. Keep the Lord always before you. And you'll experience life outside the hamster cage. You'll discover victory in the name of Jesus and through the power of His Word! 

DO YOU KNOW ME?

"And this is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent" (John 17:3).

Many of us believe God is real. Some believe He's only watching from a distance, with very little interest in what's happening down here. But actually, God is very interested and is seeking to have the most intimate relationship with you. The whole Christian life centers around that relationship. But what kind is it? 

We enjoy many relationships in our lives--with our husband, our wife, our friends, our parents, even our pets. But not all of them are on the same level. And none of them are what you would call a saving relationship, which is what the Father wants to have with you. What sets this relationship apart from all the others?

Jesus said, "this is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent" (John 17:3).  Eternity depends on knowing God, knowing Him personally, and for who He really is. But how can we know Someone that we can't see face to face? 

Most relationships out there are built on 2 important pillars--communication and time. Because relationships boil down to spending quality time together. It takes time to get to know another person, to know what they're really like--not merely what they project on the outside but what they're like deep down inside. What are their thoughts, their dreams, and their fears? In talking and doing things together, we discover who they are, bit by bit. 

But spending time together also means they become part of our life and we become part of theirs. We share more than just time and conversation. We share a life together. And that's what intimacy is all about--when we feel so safe with another person that we can be transparent with them. We don't put up any fake fronts, like we do with a stranger. We can be ourselves.  And we end up opening doors to the private side of our life that very few have entrance to. Now if you're very blessed, you may have a friend like that. And if you do, you have an inside edge in understanding the intimate relationship Jesus wants to have with you. 

Spending time with Jesus every day builds that kind of transparency. When we open up our Bible, Jesus shares His heart with us. And when we pray, we share our heart with Him. A daily Quiet Time with Jesus, as I like to call it, combines time and communication. And this consistency in connecting with Christ is the bedrock of our relationship with Him! Without prayer and Bible Study, there's no spiritual life. We may feel we love Jesus. We may be drawn to Him. But without a daily encounter with God, we can't be a Christian. We can't know God. It's just impossible. That's why the devotional life is crucial in following Jesus and the Living Way. 

But merely putting in the time isn't a foolproof way to build intimacy. It also depends on how we respond to the Word of God. Do we receive it as the Thessalonians did? Paul says, when they heard God's Word, they received it and "welcomed it, not as the word of men, but as it is in truth [as it really is], the word of God [the word of the Living God] which also effectively works in you who believe" (1 Thessalonians 2:13, words in brackets added for emphasis). 

"Just to the degree in which the word of God is received and obeyed will it impress with its potency [its strength and power] and touch with its life every spring of action, every phase of character" (Ministry of Healing, pg. 136). Because to know Jesus in a saving way or to have a saving relationship with Him is to be "vitalized by spiritual knowledge, to practice its words. Without this, all else is valueless" (Signs of the Times, 1/27/98). 

That's why Jesus says, "Not every one who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father who is in heaven" (Matthew 7:21). For when we know the Lord, our lives testify to the presence of Jesus in our life. People will see that we have been with Him. We're no longer the same selfish or worldly person that we used to be because "to know Jesus requires a change of heart. No unconverted person, in his natural state of depravity, loves Christ. A love of Jesus is the first result of conversion" (Daughters of God, pg. 240). 

But what kind of love will that be? What will it look like?  It's possible to say 'I love Jesus' and shout at my kids day after day. It's possible to say those words, to profess a relationship with Christ, and yet deny Him by the way I live.  So my love must be more than just a profession of Christ, it must go beyond saying 'I love Jesus' or 'I'm a Christian.' The love that reveals a saving relationship is a love that's seen through obedience. We love Jesus enough to call Him Lord. And that means I'm not calling the shots, I'm not doing what I want. I'm following every word that God says, and walking as He walked. 

For Jesus says, "If you love Me, keep My commandments" (John 14:15). True love for God is seen in true faithfulness to His perfect will. It's seen in a transformed life that's captivated and captive to the Word of God. "Now by this we know that we know Him if we keep His commandments. He who says 'I know Him,' and does not keep His commandments is a liar, and the truth is not in Him" (1 John 2:3,4). But, on the other hand, "whoever keeps His Word, truly the love of God is perfected in him. By this we know that we are in Him" (ibid). You see, obedience, loyalty and faihfulness are all the same thing and they're the litmus test when we examine our hearts to know if we truly know the Lord. This is how I can tell whether I've got a saving relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ.

It's not just about feeling. When I first fell in love with my husband, that's all we had. Strong feelings for one another. We didn't know Jesus when we first met so our relationship was pure emotion.   Fortunately, it didn't stay that way. And the only reason it changed was because we accepted Jesus into our lives. Now, feelings play an important part in a relationship, but it can't last if that's all there is. And sometimes, that's what happens in a relationship with Jesus. Some people rely so completely on feeling that they never learn what it means to be His disciple. And Jesus says, "Whoever of you does not forsake all  that he has cannot be My disciple" (Luke 14:33). Our relationship has to move beyond feeling to get to living faith.

And faith is not feeling. It's not just believing a list of facts about Christ. It's a gift of God that reaches inside and changes our heart. Without saving faith there's no saving relationship. There's only a lifeless form of godliness. And that kind of relationship is self-centered. It still takes pleasure in worldly entertainment. It's satisfied with hearing about Jesus or thinking about Jesus, but it knows nothing of His saving power. 

"Those who possess this religion regard sin so lightly because they do not know Jesus" (Messages to Young People, pg. 106). When we know Christ as He really is, we'll be radically different. We'll reflect the love and holiness of our Savior because He is in us and we are in Him. We've let Him in the front door of our heart and He's now our welcome Guest. His Word is treasured in our life; it's our lifeline to heaven. And everything that Jesus asks or even commands is no longer a burden, but our greatest delight! Because His love consumes us and transforms us! And it's so evident to everyone who knows us. They can see the fruit of our saving relationship with Jesus. The same love of Christ is there, the character of God is glowing, and there's peace where there used to be only distress or despair. There's victory where there used to be sin and rebellion. 

To know Jesus is to be like Jesus. To know Him is to reveal His character to the world. So do you know Christ or do you only know about Him? It all depends on how you receive His Word. Do you live by what He says? Are His words changing your life at home? Does your family see more kindness and patience in you? Do you show true humility or do you pursue your own agenda in your own way? Can others see the love of Jesus in how you treat others, even those who disagree with you?  "Love to Christ cannot exist without corresponding love to those whom He came into the world to redeem. Love to Christ must be the principle of our being, controlling all the emotions and directing all the energies" (Testimonies to the Church, vol 3., pg. 396). 

"Beloved, let us love one another, for love is of God, and he who loves is born of God and knows God" (1 John 4:8). So let us love to spend time with Jesus every single day. Let us receive His Word into our hearts and live by them. Let us obey all His commandments because we love Him. Let us shine with the same self-sacrificing love that He showed on this earth. Love for God, love for our families, love for those who don't love us, and for those who don't know God. These are the fruits of a saving relationship with Jesus. They're also the terms by which we can know if we truly know Him. 

Take time to measure your life with the character of God. And seek a saving relationship with Jesus every single day until He comes. For this is what eternal life is all about!